GOOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLLL! On Saturday morning for a brief moment after the gym and before I allowed myself a sip of water the scale hit goal. 50 pounds down! It was in a word glorious and I was convinced that it would just continue to go down, but atlas. No. This morning after the gym the scale was up 4.8 pounds from Saturday morning. I'm frustrated. My husband says I'm being too literal about the scale and what it's showing and that I need to relax, but how? I trust the scale numbers. That's what's validating my actual weight loss since I'm down (almost) 50 pounds and NO ONE is still saying anything about any physical changes and it's really starting to get to me.
I did notice one thing that might have a small influence as to why no one has noticed. While I'm buying smaller pants (down 3 sizes from July 5) so I don't walk around with diaper butt, I have not really bought anything fitted or smaller for my top half. Yesterday afternoon at my best friend's house warming party (where I was surrounded by gay men who have known me for years) again no one noticed. It wasn't until I was home and walked by a mirror that I noticed that there was a good 6 inches of extra material that I could easily gather up, and with the cut of the empire shirt that was I wearing didn't show off any weight loss, but looked like I filled it out like I used to. So a new goal is to start putting on shirts and if I can easily grab a handful of material when sitting the shirt is too big and needs to go into the pile to donate.
In two days it will be my three month anniversary of starting this diet. The first month if anyone had told me that I would not only be able to survive on 1600 calories a day but also be able to go to the gym almost every morning and do the elliptical for 30 - 50 minutes without dying, I would have thought they were crazy, but here I am on the verge of 100 days and even though no one has said anything I keep having hope that soon, someone, anyone will notice a change and comment on it.
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